Introducing the caveman pizza

Domino’s PizzaWhen pizzas were first invented as a way of creating a cheap meal, little did they know what they would be turned into by the might of Dominos.

That beacon of fast food has introduced a new tempting feast to its range, called Domino’s Premiere. A pizza of truly epic proportions.

And what, pray, does the Premiere boast as its topping? A little mushroom and asparagus, perhaps? Maybe some tuna, capers and anchovies? Not a bit of it.

The Premiere is a pizza for the truly unreconstructed. A pizza aimed fair and square at the carnivores of this world.

If you order a Dominos Premiere you get the following quartet of toppings: pepperoni, chorizo, steak and pastrami. Meat, a little more meat, ooh some of that meat and, why not a little bit extra meat just to make it up.

Tell me, please, that people out there don’t really want something like this. Surely…

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